All I Want For Cosmic (Full Transcript) Scene 0: (Cheerful-sounding Christmas music plays as the show starts which slowly fades as Eli strides along a corridor in the admin building towards a pair of ornate sliding doors at the end. The doors open revealing the admin area, Nate and Drone 9 3 0 0 struggling with an undecorated Christmas tree.) Drone: (in a panic) NO let me handle the weight! Nate: (As the tree begins to tilt towards the drone) Oh that's done it. Nate: (Shouting in the manner of a lumber jack) Timber! (The tree crashes down on the drone who groans beneath it.) Drone: (Plaintively) Ow ow ow. Why did they program me to feel pain? Eli: (From the doorway) So, the party's getting started without me, huh? Title sequence: The hosts of cosmic rage present All I want for cosmic is talent Scene 1: (Eli enters from the left and strides towards Nate. The two hosts begin conversing in overly camp British accents.) Nate: (Cheerfully) Eli you old rogue! Glad to see you could make it. Eli: In deed old chap! I wouldn't miss it for the world! I said I'd make it, and so I have. (The two hosts hug.) Drone: (Struggling beneath the fallen tree) Don't mind me! I'll just be here under the Christmas tree... rusting! Eli: Let me handle that for you, Drone 9 3 0 0. It just takes a little eval, and ... (Lines of code flash from Eli's fingers and there is a whoosh.) Eli: The tree is upright! Drone: (Turns incredulously to look at Nate and Eli) Wait. You mean to tell me you guys could've strung that up with a simple eval? Eli and Nate: Yep. Eli: We are coders after all. Drone: (Plaintively) Then why did you need me to help you? Nate: Because it was more fun of course! (Eli and Nate share a chuckle.) Drone: Oh for goodness sakes. (Drone turns away and whirs out of the room, singing under his breath a song set to the tune of "I've Been Working On the Railroad") Drone: I've been working with the same hosts. All the flippin' day. Nate: Hmm. Was it something I said? Eli: Absolutely no clue, old chap. Drones be dronin' as they say. Nate: (chuckles) Yes quite. Eli: So then, I see this place is only half decorated. You're useless without the rest of us, eh? Nate: Steady on, old bean. Steady on! I am the head admin after all. That comes with certain expected skills. Like this for example. (Nate raises his hands and code swirls around them as something materializes.) Eli: What've you got there? Nate: Well, you know Christmas crackers, old chap? We each grab one end, give it a good tug, and bang, off it goes and we each get a little surprise. Eli: Yes yes, I have read Harry Potter before old chap. Nate: (snorts derisively) Hang Harry Potter. These are Cosmic crackers, old chap. Here, take one end. ON three we pull. Are you ready? Eli: (enthusiastically) Righto! (The two hosts grab a massive gaudy cosmic cracker at either end and grab hold of the massive hand grips coming from either end.) Eli and Nate: One! Two! Three! (The two hosts strain in opposite directions, playing tug of war with the cracker.) Nate: Come on old chap! Give it some welly, won't you! Eli: I'm trying, old chap! Nate: Well pull harder! Eli: (Indignantly) Pull harder? I'm throwing my entire body weight against it; in this position, I couldn't do anything but pull! (The cosmic cracker slowly begins to stretch until finally... it explodes sending code, confetti, and hosts in every direction.) Eli: (picking himself up and limping back towards the Christmas tree) Ouch, that stings. Nate: (Limping back towards Eli) I, ehem, might have put a little too much gun powder, old chap. Eli: Did it really need that much gun powder, old chap? Nate: Everything needs a bit of gun powder, old chap. Eli: Yes, I suppose so. (The two share a bit of a laugh.) Nate: Anyway, I got the hat, (He holds up a flimsy paper hat) What'd you get, old chap? Eli: No clue what this is. This joke is rubbish! (He holds up a piece of paper) Recap of the talent show? Nate: Ahh yes, I remember that. There should be a play command on that somewhere. I think I defined that verb anyway. Eli: A play command? (He flips the paper over.) OH yes, so there is old chap. (Eli activates the paper, and code streams from it to start playing the recap of the last talent show.) (As the recap ends, Eli and Nate are clapping.) Nate: Ahh that was a lovely talent show! Eli: Yes. Simply splendid old bean, simply splendid. Nate: Yes, every time we do another talent show, it simply seems to get better and better. One might say it gets more cosmic, what. Eli: Ha ha ha. I like what you did there, old bean. (The two hosts chortle superciliously for a bit before clearing their throats.) Eli: Yes well, about this tree, any chance of some decorations? Nate: Ahh but yes of course! Of course! (Nate walks over to a solitary cardboard box and opens it.) Nate: Aha! Let's see. Catch! (Nate hefts a Christmas ballball and hurls it at Eli who manages to catch it.) Eli: Watch it old bean! Watch it. You nearly had my eye out with this... What do you call these things? Christmas (switching briefly to his American accent) bobble? Nate: No no no old sport, it's a ballball. Eli: Yes, that's what I said. A bobble. Nate: No no, a ball-- Eli: (Interrupting him) Anyway, whatever you call it, (back in a phony British accent) you nearly had my eye-- Nate: (Elbowing Eli in the ribs to interrupt him) Well, all of the decorations this year have talent show entries embedded into them. Just like that one. What one have you got there? Eli: I say, that's rather good. This one's Pegasus and the Pegasi singing "Christmas Don't Be Late." (Eli spins the ballball in his hands, and the song begins to play.) (As the song ends, Eli is fiddling with the ballball near the tree while Nate rummages in the cardboard box.) Eli: (Muttering to himself) Let's see. hang it up... Move it up a bit... Ahh! Perfect! (Eli steps back from the tree and goes over to Nate.) Eli: What've you got there? Nate: Ahh it's in a knot. Ugh this always happens. Just need to... Eli: Careful, careful... Oops. (Nate violently tears apart the colorful something he's holding in his hands which he is still pulling from the box as he heads towards the tree.)\ Nate: Ahh there we go. Tinsel! That's done the trick! So I'll string it up over here, (moving around the tree with the tinsel) drape it over there a bit more... (Nate steps back from the tree looking pleased.) Nate: There we go. What do you think? Eli: Ahh. Slightly straighten it up on the right side, my dear boy. Nate: Okay. Like this? Eli: No... down a bit. Nate: Alrighty, like this? Eli: Hmm. Actually you know, it looked better the first way. Honestly I can't get the right angle. Nate: Why don't you try just floating up there, old chap, just raise yourself off the floor. It might get you a better angle. While you're doing that though, I'm going to string up this tinsel which, funnily enough, has a few acts attached to it. There's this one here, for example which is Silent Night performed in both English and Arabic by that army of babies that constantly assault everyone everywhere, ABabyAssault! (As Nate begins the act, Eli lifts his arms and drifts into the air, lines of code shimmering around him as he floats.) (As the act ends, Nate is still adjusting the tinsel while Eli floats around the tree.) Nate: I say. Wasn't that just marvelous? Now, What have we got here? Ahh at this end of the tinsel, we've got another act. It's Endless Love by Titania. (Nate makes one final adjustment, and code flies from the tinsel to start the act.) Nate: That should do it. (Eli drifts in for a landing as he speaks.) Eli: Ahh! How silly of me! The floor was crooked! Looks perfect, old sport! Nate: Capital! Eli: (Dusting his hands off) Right. Next decoration. Bring on the motley. Nate: Ehem.. (shuffles awkwardly on the spot and pats his pockets.) Eli: (Beat) Uh... Nate? Nate: Yes? Eli: Next decoration? Come on. Chop chop. (He snaps his fingers.) Nate: The uh... (Begins edging towards the box.) The... next... um... Eli: (Pursuing Nate towards the box) You did actually bring more decorations. Right? (The two hosts reopen the box and peer inside.) Nate: Weeeeeell... I thought about it. Eli: (Throwing his hands up exasperatedly) Really? How are we supposed to decorate the entire tree with some tinsel and one ballball? Nate: (indignantly) And a hat! (He holds up his paper hat.) Eli: (Hurrying towards stage left) Blast the hat, old man! Go get some decorations! I'll see if Dante's got anything for us! (The two hosts hurry out of the admin area as the scene ends.) Scene 2: (Eli is striding along another corridor in the admin building, and he is once more speaking in his usual American accent.) Eli: One ornament! Really. He just brings one ornament! (He begins climbing down a latter towards a massive submarine-like hatch in the ground.) Eli: We're not builders. We can't just... (He snaps his fingers) and make another ornament appear. Anyway... (He jumps off the ladder at the bottom and dusts himself off.) Eli: Ahh here's Dante's lab. (He opens the door and carefully steps inside the huge underground space.) Eli: Hello? Eli: Dante? Anybody home? Dante: (From deeper in the lab) Wait! Don't let the gremlin out! (A code gremlin scurries past Eli towards the door.) Eli: Hang on! I got it I got it I got it! (Eli runs after the gremlin, snatches it up, and dropkicks it back into the depths of the lab.) Eli: Gotcha. Dante: Good catch. Did you need something? Eli: Yeah I was just wondering if you had any holiday decorations to put up. (Conspiratorially) Nate didn't bring enough. Dante: (Sounding amused) Alrighty. (He goes over to a pile of assorted experiments and junk, beginning to sort through them and hurl them over his shoulder in some cases.) Dante: Starship... Dante: Some rocks... Dante: A traceback... Eli: (Holding up one hand to stop Dante throwing the next thing and taking an ornament from his hands) Hey check it out! You got one of the decorations right here, Dante. It's "Tu Scendi Dalle Stelle" performed by Exodia! (Eli twists the two halves of the ornament, and code streams from it to play the next act.) (As the act ends, Dante is still sorting through some junk.) Dante: Aha here it is! (A crash of thunder sounds as he wheels out a massive weapon resembling a cross between a cannon and a machine gun.) Eli: (Taking a step back) Whoa. What is that? Dante: The decomatic 500! Mark I. Jr. Eli: I... See... Right. (Dante reaches over and turns on a projector which starts an infomercial-like series of images.) Dante: Have you ever needed a tree decorated? You have a mother-in-law coming over in five minutes? Seek no more! The decomatic 5000 is here! (He demonstrates how to load the machine as the slide show plays.) Dante: Just load it up with all your decorations, aim, and fire! Eli: Uh-huh. But does it work? Dante: It worked when I tested it. (The slide show ends.) Eli: Riiiiiight. (Eli heads for the door, seemingly looking for something.) Eli: Ah! Drone 9 3 0 0! (The drone is minding his business heading past outside.) Drone: Huh? Eli: Come here a moment, will you? (The drone follows Eli into the lab.) Drone: What do you want? I have stuff for Brandon to carry! Eli: Come come. This won't take a moment. Just stand, or hover... or fly or whatever... over there for a moment and... (Eli points to a spot right in front of the Decomatic.) Drone: (Grumbles but complies) Eli: There there there. Right Dante! Let him have it! (Dante immediately begins twisting levers and aiming and setting the Decomatic.) Drone: Wait what? Have what? Dante: Aaaaand... Fire! (A stream of ornaments come flying from the barrel of the decomatic, forcefully plastering the drone with random assorted decorations. A particularly wide ornament covers the drone's main visual sensor.) Drone: Aaaahh! What? My eye! (The drone twitches and tries to shake everything off.) Eli: (Striding towards the drone) Relax, Drone 9 3 0 0. It's just an act from the talent show. In fact, this one is, (plucking the ornament off of the drone's sensor) "My Song For You," originally by Bridget Mendler, performed by DiamondQueen. (Glittering sparkles fly from Eli's fingers, activating the ornament.) (When the act ends, Eli is standing over by the Decomatic once more, examining it and looking delighted.) Drone: What the hell? What'd you guys do to me? Eli: Hey Dante! It worked! Dante: (Indignantly) Of course it worked! What'd you expect? I made it. Drone: (Grumbling) The indignities that I go through! (The drone whirs out of the room, grumbling.) Eli: Well... I'll steer, you push? (Eli climbs up on the decomatic.) Dante: (Watching the drone go) Okay. (Dante begins pushing the decomatic with Eli riding on top.) Scene 3: (In Brandon's apartment, Brandon is heading over to a terrarium with some treats in hand.) Brandon: Aww, who are my cute little turtles? My pretty little turtles. (Brandon hands some handfuls of food down.) Brandon: Have some lettuce. Cute turtles. (The door opens and a familiar drone enters, decorations and jingle bells hanging from its casing.) Brandon: Drone 9 3 0 0? Drone: (Grumbles wordlessly) Brandon: Aw, what's the matter? (Brandon rushes over and throws his arms around the drone for a hug.) Drone: I look ridiculous! the stupid hosts and their stupid ideas and now this happened! Brandon: It's not that bad. You look awesome! Super festive. Drone: (Grumbles wordlessly) Brandon: No really! you could conduct the host band looking like that. Drone: aaaaah, you're just trying to be nice to me. Why are you always nice to me? Besides, conducting isn't that your job? Brandon: Between you and me, there's really nothing different. You could almost say we were played by the same person. Drone: (Grumbles wordlessly) Brandon: Look I can prove it. read this: (Brandon hands a piece of paper over to the drone who snatches it in a grabber claw.) Drone: Fine. Let me see. (The drone picks up a mic and grumbles into it.) Drone: The next act is "Silver Wings" by JonnyFromTheBlock featuring Andy Bob Beaumont. (The drone reaches forward and throws a switch, and the act plays.) (As the act ends, Brandon is holding the paper again.) Brandon: That was good! But try adding a little more jingle. Like this. (Brandon takes the mic and clears his throat.) Brandon: Aaaand now! We have "Those Eyes" originally sung by New West and sung today by UmikoIshakawa! (Brandon waves his hands, scattering sparkling dust as the act begins.) (The act ends, and Brandon is handing the paper back to the drone.) Brandon: Here. try one more. Drone: Okay let's see here. Hem hem hem hem hem. (The drone fastidiously acts as if it is clearing its throat as it raises the paper and adopts a flamboyant pose.) Drone: Next up, we have "Show Yourself" from Frozen II performed by NightSky. (The drone once more flips the switch to begin the act, but this time, sparkles scatter from its grabber arm.) (The act ends, and The drone is still frozen in a flamboyant pose but quickly lets it go as it grumbles.) Drone: I don't know. I need to practice. Brandon: You can use my dressing room. I'll leave you to it. (Brandon walks over to the door as the drone nods and heads down another hallway inside the apartment to the dressing rooms beyond.) Scene 4: (Laurel and Nate are heading up the stairs to the top floor of the admin building as they talk.) Laurel: I told you. They are definitely in the loft. Nate: But I could have sworn I saw them in-- Laurel: (Interrupting him) Nope. Nate: They're next to the-- Laurel:: (Interrupting) Nope! (Nate let's out a hmph as they reach the ladder. He unfolds it and begins to climb.) Nate: Alright. I'll get them. You direct me. Let's see... (The top of his head slams into the locked loft hatch.) Nate: Ouch! I say! Laurel: (amused) Um you should probably open the hatch if you want to do that. Nate: I knew that! Don't think I didn't. I was just testing. (Nate unlatches the hatch and begins climbing again.) Nate: Alright let me see here. Where's the light? Laurel: Let me get a torch for you. (Laurel snaps her fingers, and a ball of light floats up through the hatch after Nate.) Nate: That's better! Laurel: Can you see the decorations? Nate: Nope! But I can see all the other crap--I mean all my other crap up here! Laurel: It's on the right hand side. (Nate's footsteps head off to the left.) Nate: Hey look! The suggestion box! Laurel: (affectionately annoyed) The other right, you idiot. Nate: Right! (Nate's footsteps cross to the right side of the loft. There is a pause while he looks through some stuff.) Laurel: Found it, Nate? (Nate whistles to himself as he continue to sort through stuff up in the loft, finally kicking a box through the hatch. A grumbling comes from inside the box.) Laurel: Oh for the love of... (Laurel opens the box and a code gremlin leaps out, running every which way until she is able to grab it and stuff it back in the box.) Nate: Was that it? Laurel: (laughing) Not unless you want traceback gremlins running amuck for the holiday celebrations. Coming back your way! (She picks the box up and hurls it up through the hatch.) Nate: Oi! (More rummaging before Nate hurls several more boxes through the open hatch.) Nate: See if these are any good! (Laurel begins checking on the boxes as they come down.) Laurel: Let's see here. Nate: Right that's all of them! (Nate begins making his way to the ladder, Laurel's ball of light drifting along above his head.) Laurel: One of Nathan's old gadget things. Laurel: Some old CD's. (Nate closes the hatch behind him.) Laurel: Some wrapping paper. That'll be useful. (Nate reaches the bottom of the ladder and folds it up, letting the light dissipate.) Laurel: Ahh I think this one's it. (She carries the box over to Nate and begins sorting through it.) Laurel: Ooooh! This is one of my favorite ballballs from last year. "The Gift" by Shelby1995 a cappella. (She activates the ballball, and the act begins.) (Nate is now also going through the box after the act and hefts another decoration.) Nate: Ahh blooming marvelous! I thought we'd lost this one. It's "Felice Navidad" by Jose Feliciano but this time produced by Tunmi! On the beat! (With a sharp gesture, he tosses the decoration into the air and the act begins.) (As the act ends, Nate is fumbling yet another decoration. Laurel swiftly catches it.) Nate: Whoops! Laurel: Watch it! You nearly dropped that wreath. They're quite delicate, you know. And this one has "Happy New Year" by LittleNessie in it. (Laurel activates the wreath with sparkles from her fingertips.) (The boxes are now all packed up and ready to go as the act comes to a close.) Laurel: Okay. Now just to get these to the admin area. Nate: Yep. half each? I'll hold out my arms, and you stack them up. Laurel: Okey dokey! (Laurel immediately begins piling presents into Nate's arms, quickly exceeding the half that he was meant to carry.) Nate: Wait wait, that one's a bit big. Hang on! We said half first! Don't load me up with all of them! That's not fair! (Now loaded down with a huge mountain of decorations, Nate makes his slow way towards the stairs.) Laurel: Oh! There's only this one small box left! I guess I'll take that one! (Laurel snatches up the box and heads after Nate.) Scene 5: (Laurel is striding along a corridor in the admin building when she comes across Brandon at a crossroads.) Laurel: Brandooooon! Brandon: Laurel! (The two hosts hug.) Brandon: What do you got there? Laurel: Oh in the box? Christmas stuff. Here. Like this Santa. Brandon: Hey cool! Is that one of the ones that sing? Laurel: Yep. You just turn the key here... And it plays "Santa Baby" by SirenOfStorms originally sung by Eartha Kitt. (The Santa activates in her hands, and the act begins.) (Brandon and Laurel are still watching the act inside the wind-up Santa as it ends.) Brandon: Is that for Nate? Brandon: (Gasps) Oh shoot. I need to grab the drinks from the kitchen! (The two hosts head off down a corridor together.) (In the kitchen, several drones and servants are hard at work preparing the Christmas feast. The door opens, and Laurel and Brandon come in mid conversation, Brandon pushing a large trolley.) Laurel: I don't think so. Oh someone's left a jingle bell on the counter. It has "Believe" from the Polar Express performed by SpacePup! (The jingle bell activates as soon as she touches it.) (The act fades away as Brandon abandons the trolley for a moment.) Brandon: Oh and look on the floor over there. Laurel: Is that a cracked snow globe? Brandon: (Picking it up and turning it in his hands) Yeah. But I think I can fix it. And... Ahh yes! It's got the next act in the talent show! "Walking In the Air" performed by Amygilbert0864. (Code dances from Brandon's fingers as he quickly repairs the snow globe, and it activates.) (Brandon is once more hard at work collecting glasses and drinks as the act comes to a close.) Brandon: Looks like one of those decorations the drone was wearing. From Dante's cannon. Laurel: Dante's what? Did you say cannon? Brandon: Well from the way the drone tells it, Dante's got a new invention. Laurel: Oh no. Brandon: Oh yes. (The two share a chuckle as Brandon wheels the loaded trolley towards the door.) Laurel: Here. Let me grab the door. Brandon: Thanks! (Our view switches to the corridor outside as the two of them head out of the kitchen.) Laurel: So, what is this invention then? Brandon: Oh yeah! Well, it sort of looks like a giant cannon, apparently. Laurel: What? Why do so many of the things our fellow hosts create resemble giant firearms? Brandon: (As they head into the distance) I don't know. Maybe they need counseling. Scene 6: (Dante, Eli, and Nate are grouped around the decomatic in the admin area when laurel and Brandon enter, Brandon still pushing the loaded trolley.) Eli: (conspiratorially) it's a bit risky, I mean-- Dante: It's a great idea! Nate: It'll be fine! Eli: I just don't think they'll agree. Laurel: (Coming over to investigate the decomatic) Agree to what? (Brandon begins unloading the trolley onto a serving counter some ways away.) Nate, Dante, and Eli: (Like guilty brothers who just got caught) Nothing! Nate whispering: Did you load the stuff? Eli: Yes yes it's loaded. it's loaded. Dante: (Drill sergeant voice as he primes the decomatic) Okay! Ready! Laurel: (Sounding suspicious) what are you doing? Dante: Aim! (Eli and Nate aim the decomatic at the tree.) Brandon: (Desperately running over to stop them) Wait no stop! Dante, Eli, and Nate: Fire! (There is a dramatic pause as the cannon powers up and spits a massive load of all the decorations from the loft at the tree all at once. For the most part, it works, but a few of the larger items fall to the ground and go rolling away or smash. Brandon facepalms. Nate, Eli, and Dante let out whoops of joy.) Laurel: (sighs but can't hide her amusement) Boys and their toys. Besides, however well it worked, it missed the topper. (Sarcastically) good job... Nate: I got it! (Nate charges at Laurel and picks her up by the waist, shimmering code swirling around them as they begin to float towards the top of the tree.) Laurel: (Sternly as if addressing a naughty dog) Nathan. Put! Me! down! Nate: I will! On the tree, will look great! Laurel: You, my darling, are an idiot. Now put me down. Nate: seriously. You'll look amazing up there! (Laurel lets out a sigh and twists in his arms.) Nate: No wait Laurueeeeeeeeeeel. (She boots him hard in the chest, and he goes flying through a window high up in the admin area leaving Laurel hanging in mid air.) Laurel: Well, now that I'm nearly at the top anyway, I may as well put this topper on. You know, the one I had in this box the whole time! (The main doors to the admin area open and Nate enters.) Nate: (in the distance) Rude! Laurel: (placing the topper) there we are. (calls to Nate) Switch it on Nate! Nate: (Calling up to her) I got it! (Nate walks over to a massive switch and flips it, causing the Christmas light display on the tree and around the admin area to light up.) (Drone 9 3 0 0 whirs in, jingle bells jangling on him merrily and a Santa hat on his head.) Laurel: (From atop the tree) What the... Nate: (heading back to the others) What... Is that! On your head! Drone: Shut up! It's pretty! I look very handsome! It's festive. because I'm leading today's Christmas show! So get in line! (The hosts shuffle over to the tree, Laurel swooping down to land in the center of the line-up.) Drone: Okay! and a 1, and a 2. (The drone conducts as the host band materializes behind the tree.) Drone: (half to himself) And a jingle jingle jingle. (NO one sings at his cue. The drone gives them a moment then gestures violently at the band who stop instantly.) Drone: you're supposed to sing! am I rushing or am I dragging! Drone: Lets try again, hem hem! (Glaring at the hosts, he cues them again, and the musical number begins.) Scene 7: (The band plays as a spotlight shines on Laurel standing before the Christmas tree.) Intro: (Laurel) I, Don't want a lot for Cosmic, Rage is all I really need. I don't care about the tracebacks, Help files that I need to read. (A traceback and a help file chase each other past her as she sings.) I just want to play all night, Morning 'til the evening light, A player base that's true, All I want for Cosmic is... You. (A shower of sparkles fly from her fingers, and Eli steps through them as Laurel drifts out of the spotlight. Two versions of Brandon stand on either side of him singing backup.) Verse 1: (Eli) I don't want a lot for Cosmic, There is just one thing I need. (Brandon: And I) will fix assists aplenty, There's a mount you cannot lead. (Eli rapidly fix an assist.) I won't even mind the spam that clobbers me when I log in (A bunch of reports and support ticket warnings flash past him.) (Brandon: Answer) Answering some folks on Newbie, [Newbie], NathanSmith: Does anyone know the command for newbie? I can't find it! I just want to code a game, to get you to log in again. So make my dreams come true. (Someone accept's an IC link request from Eli.) All I want for Cosmic is you! (Eli steps back and duplicates, taking Brandon's place while the latter makes a four four motion in the air and appears in the beam of the spotlight.) Eli: Take it away, Brandon! Verse 2: (Brandon) I won't ask for much for Cosmic, Give me cuddles any day. (Eli: And I) I won't even grumble when my Favorite turtle runs away. (Brandon tries to grab a tiny green turtle as it slips out from his pocket.) I just want to code some babies, For my lovely Cosmic Rage. (a giggling baby appears in Brandon's arms, and he dances with it.) (Eli: Just pay) Just make sure you pay the price to Bring them on your Cosmic stage. I just want to play CR, with my lovelies near and far, (Brandon's synaptic signal wavers for a moment, then returns with a snap!) Oh and have some coffee, too! (He gestures, and a mug of coffee materializes in your right hand.) All I want for Cosmic is you! (Eli and Brandon give a perfectly timed leap back as Nate and Dante appear in the spotlight's been on either side of Laurel.) Bridge: Laurel: It's a grand old time with roleplay every where! (Emotes, channel traffic, and random emotes sweep across all of CR.) Nate: And The sounds of Lara's cursing fills the air! (Little rage punches fly in all directions from Nate as he sings.) Dante: The cash grenades are flying! Uh-oh! My traceback monkeys are dying! (Dante hurls a steel cash grenade at us, and it hits and destroys a cage with a traceback monkey.) (All of the hosts join the trio in perfectly choreographed dance moves and sing.) Let's send an invasion to get the players ragin'! (The drone holds up a stop sign, and the host band freezes mid dance.) Drone: Don't you dare! The Vacus are on holiday! (All the hosts express their disappointment, Nate raising his voice above the chorus.) Nate: Who's the chief admin here anyway? (The hosts now dance in a semi-circle, the Christmas tree standing proudly behind them.) Verse 3: (Laurel) We don't want a lot for Cosmic. This is all we're asking for. (Brandon) We just want to make you happy, so party like never before. Eli: Log your favorite character in. Nate and Dante: Now the real fun can begin! Everyone: Chill out for a few, because all we want for Cosmic (All the hosts raise their arms, and streamers of light lift Laurel into the air as she sings.) Laurel: Is you! Brandon and Eli: Oooh Cosmic! (As the band fades away into nothing, all of the hosts celebrate together, running to each other and hugging.) Nate: Bravo! Bravo! Let's *hick up* never do that again. Eli: (striding over and slapping Nate cheerfully on the back) Oh don't be such a Scrooge, old sport. Anyway... (A banquet table appears, and the hosts begin making their way to their seats as Eli strides towards his own seat, addressing the audience.) Eli: You guys did great. And the rest of you too! Everyone who participated in the talent show. Who brought the drinks? We need a toast! Brandon: On it! (Brandon and the drone head over to the drinks table while Nate pulls out a seat for Laurel and sits at the head of the table.) Laurel: Well, who should do it? (Nate and Eli simultaneously nominate each other.) Nate: Oh no no no. After you, old chap. Eli: Oh no no, I insist, old chap. After you. Drone: (Twisting the cork off a bottle) Oh don't start this again! Nate and Eli: (contritely) Sorry, Drone. Brandon: (pouring several drinks) Have Dante do it! Laurel: Yeah. he's probably the most heart-felt among us. Eli and Nate: Yes! Here here! Dante: (Getting up from his seat and strolling to the spotlight) Aww sweety, thank you. That warms my heart. Eli: Take it away, Dante! (Brandon and the drone begin handing out drinks as Dante picks up the microphone and begins his toast.) Dante's Toast: Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, hearing the songs of the choir. That's what Christmas means to me, as anyone can plainly see. With carolers singing in the street, the Christmas turkey in rising heat. And out playing in the snow, and also watching our families grow. I hope you like Christmas, too. Happy holidays from me... to you. (All of the hosts clink their glasses together, even including the drone in their toast.) Everyone: Cheers! End Credits: You have been Listening to All I Want for Cosmic is Talent. nathanTech claims no ownership to any of the music or performances in this production. Script author: Nathan Smith Script editor: Mario Garcia Cast: Head Admin Nate: Nathan Smith Drone 9300 and Brandon Red designation: Brandon Reed Eli Perez: Mario Garcia Dante Steel: David Keats Laurel Nightshade: Laura Tyler Other rolls played by members of the cast Includes sound effects and music from https://www.asoundeffect.com/ https://www.zapsplat.com/ Thank you for listening!